Hypercrianza causes immaturity and frustration in children
The problem of hyper-affection, that is, the need to solve all the problems of our children, to the point of anticipating them, is a burning issue. His reasoning could be summarized as follows: I love him so much that when I see that this or that thing is a danger or can make him suffer, as a mother
The problem of hyper-affection, that is, the need to solve all the problems of our children, to the point of anticipating them, is a burning issue.
His reasoning could be summarized as follows: I love him so much that when I see that this or that thing is a danger or can make him suffer, as a mother, or father, I understand that I have to avoid it de, just as when I have hungry feed him or when he is cold I clothe him.How hyper-parenting affects parents and children
However, the experience ends up showing that, in addition to being a practice that generates certain levels of stress and overwhelm in parents,
this hyperprotection causes in children, among others, future problems of frustration and immaturity ya, since life establishes with all of us, in our adult life, a dialogue that we must know how to speak, and how many more words we have in our better vocabulary; but if in our childhood we have not been allowed to experience realities such as denial, or responsibility, words otherwise used in life, our language will be rather poor.It is not an easy subject, the reason points a few things but the heart seems to pull the other way. I propose a vision that allows us to reconcile both aspects, which consists of seeing our children as living beings, in a process of expansion of which we participate, and we can enjoy, as long as we keep in mind that this expansion must meet two requirements: experimental, and own.-
, because, by way of example, they will not learn to walk on the basis of explanations, but with practice, giving themselves a few culazos and receiving the stimuli and the appropriate aids to end up supporting themselves; Holding him by the hands, yes, but not carrying him in his arms. Also some physiological processes speak clearly in this direction, our son has to pass experimentally for constipation and flu so that his body "learns" by its own means to relate to certain pathogens generating the defense mechanisms that allow him to overcome them; and that process is essential if you want to lead a normal life afterwards. -Own
because its expansion, its growth, is not a carbon copy of ours, we have traveled a path and we have an experience to provide them, but they do not have to tread exactly our same steps. Because he, or she, is the protagonist of his life, and as such he has to assume in everything that happens to him; If there is a blow with a table, the table is not "bad, bad", but an opportunity to realize what has happened, in order to avoid it in the future. In this way, the relevant role will not have something external, the chair, but he or she, as a capacity to realize, to learn, and to handle reality. Respecting these two concepts, experience and protagonism, our participation in this process can be joyful, as long as we enjoy (and, why not, do ours) this expansion in which we are, as it were, on one side, pushing, orienting and encouraging, and not over, being a weight.
Thus, instead of transmitting fear and prevention for dangers often to come, and boundless, we share with them day by day the joy of their fulfillment, the pleasure of living, and teaching to live, the adventure of life. Jordi Calm Guiteras Personal Advisor