Mistakes of parents towards children in a separation

Breakups of parents is an unpleasant process that some children have to experience. For children it involves a sudden and unexpected change of life that they do not usually understand or accept. On the part of the parents, the process is painful and difficult. Separation is a process that needs time

Breakups of parents is an unpleasant process that some children have to experience. For children it involves a sudden and unexpected change of life that they do not usually understand or accept. On the part of the parents, the process is painful and difficult.

Separation is a process that needs time, maturity and commitment from adults. If parents know how to overcome difficulties and manage to lead the separation process in a healthy way, they can avoid a lot of damage to their children. However, there are common mistakes that parents can make in a separation or divorce.

Common mistakes of parents in a separation

When the couple separates, they try to do their best not to hurt their children. The problem is that in practice mistakes are made that can hurt children during the separation process señalar and point them out for the future. The most common mistakes of divorced couples are: - To speak badly of the absent mother or father.

Some parents can instill feelings in the child based on the lie. The child hurts the bad that can be said of any of their parents so you have to know how to separate the role of a couple who is divorcing the role of father or mother. - Choose between one or the other.

You can not choose because the son loves both of you. In the end you will feel closer to the one who shows you affection and love. - Present new partners continuously.

Children tend to care easily so you have to be careful to introduce them to other couples before they are established. - Live with the new couple

. Another mistake is when the new couple is not established, forcing the child to live with her. You have to respect the choice of the child and not force it so there are no problems of coexistence.- Assume that being away from the couple is being away from the children

. It is one thing to relate to the couple and another with the children. We must make use of communication to show affection for children and closeness.- Children feel guilty

. There are parents who do not accept responsibility for their actions and make the children bear this responsibility.- Substitute the affection with material things.

Some parents feel the guilt of not living with their children respond with gifts instead of love and love. The value system is altered and children can begin to give more importance to the material than to the affective. - Differences in the child's education

. Both parents seek the best for the child but sometimes it differs in the way of educating him, for example, a more strict and more flexible in which the child will learn to use these differences in their benefit by altering their scale of values ​​as well.- Abusing outside help for the care of children.

Abusing resources of nannies, caregivers or out-of-school children ends up by "ignoring" the child himself. How to act to avoid mistakes to the children in a separation

Separation and divorce is a process in which there are many factors that can enhance their discomfort as for example, the break itself, the move to another home, lawyers, etc. This causes parents to unconsciously commit mistakes with their own children. Adapting to the new life takes time but it does arrive. Parents and children will adapt to the new circumstances. For this, if some of the most common mistakes have been committed, it is advisable: Lo - First,

rectify immediately

if the parents realize that they have committed some of the common mistakes in which they tend to fall. - Recognize that you are acting badly

to avoid causing more insecurities and confusion in your children. - Create routines and shifts . Keeping the same old activities both at school and extracurricular activities is beneficial for children.

- Do not speak badly about the other party.She is the ex-partner but she is still the father or mother of the children.

- Make the children see that although the parents are separated they will continue being their parents

and they will never stop being one. - Avoid overprotection . Avoid being too permissive in the wake of separation.