Sarcasm, a dangerous weapon with children

We may think that sarcasm is a good way of saying things to our children; apparently brings humor and our face does not reflect the uncontrollable anger we feel at times, so we thought: "Much better than a scream or a bad face right?" However, nothing further from reality. Sarcasm is a dangerous wea

We may think that sarcasm is a good way of saying things to our children; apparently brings humor and our face does not reflect the uncontrollable anger we feel at times, so we thought: "Much better than a scream or a bad face right?"

However, nothing further from reality. Sarcasm is a dangerous weapon that has a double edge, and that, surely, we have learned from our parents, that's why it seems so natural, and even fun. Here are several reasons why you should not use sarcasm with your children.

Why you should avoid being sarcastic with your children

1- Hurt your feelings: When you use sarcasm the real message you transmit is negative, and according to the phrase you use you can hurt their feelings. It looks very good in the famous phrase: "are you stupid or what?", When what you want to say is: "I hope you understand me".

2- It takes you away from your children: The irony masks your true feelings, you are really teaching the child to lie with humor; not to express with your body and gestures what you really want to say, what the child will not understand properly and, therefore, will not feel any empathy with you, or attachment.

3- It is a lack of respect: The way you say things matters a lot. Sarcasm tends to imply a lack of respect even to say things with a positive message; For example, when you say to your child: "How ugly you are" when you want to say: "you are gorgeous". Your son will learn to use this sarcasm with you and with others, and soon you will find that disrespect turns against yourself, as well as complicating communication with others.

4- It generates insecurity: Your face and your gestures do not reflect what you really mean. The child, especially if he is very young, may not understand your message and misunderstand it. Surely you will feel confused and you will not know if it is a joke or is really doing something wrong. Use the phrases in a positive and above all sincere tone; instead of: "Do you think I am your slave?", it is better to say: "You can do it yourself".

5- Destroy empathy: Empathy is one of the most important skills your child should learn throughout his life. Putting oneself in the situation of the other is vital to be able to resolve conflicts effectively and in a positive way for both parties; when sarcasm is used the other can not perceive the true feelings of the speaker and, therefore, can not be put in their situation. Sarcasm is not a sincere feeling, empathy itself.

6- You stand above him: When we communicate through sarcasm, we are putting ourselves above the person we speak to, who usually gets upset with our phrase or attitude, and usually does not find the right answer to fight it. It is not a good place to start a dialogue, especially if we want our children to learn something.