Parents who believe that their children are the best
Some parents insist on entering absurd competitions to show that their son is the best, or that they are the ones who best care for him. The awareness of competitiveness that exists today overwhelms adults and this causes a conflict between them to see which child has achieved the most achievements
Some parents insist on entering absurd competitions to show that their son is the best, or that they are the ones who best care for him. The awareness of competitiveness that exists today overwhelms adults and this causes a conflict between them to see which child has achieved the most achievements and the search for self-affirmation as parents.
These comparisons will sometimes be without bad intention, but other times they appear to cause inferiority, to make them feel less than others, taking the form of attacks. These "aggressions", in turn, cause much concern in parents who will believe that their child is behind in their evolutionary development.
"My son is smarter, more handsome and gets better grades"
Parents want their children to be happy and to be prepared for life. But in the hunger for that search they drown in fear and insecurity for everything that surrounds them and they look for an answer in comparisons with other parents. They do not take into account that each child is a world and the rhythm it carries is different from others, which makes each child stand out or not in something.
Comparisons between children are unfair and unfriendly. These carry implicit a reproach that the father makes the child making him see that his effort is not enough. This requirement causes the child to be frustrated. If the child is pressured to be the best, it affects him negatively. With the competition that exists between parents to see who is the best you can:
- Harm the child's self-esteem. Parents send a message to their child in which it is implied that their qualities are not valued and that they do not serve us. This makes children feel insecure.
- Rivalry with other children is created. With competition we can only destroy the child's relationship with his peers. (The presence of bullying is encouraged)
Why do parents compete?
For all parents, your child is the most handsome, the most friendly, the ones who behave best in the park, etc. Since the birth of children, their parents enter a competition to show others how good their child is compared to others.
- The first comparison that occurs, especially in first-time mothers, is of the baby's weight. Growth percentiles take the character of a league classification in which your child will win the league or go down to the second division.
- The comparisons then focus on the parents' desire for the children to go before the end of the year. This competition can affect the motor development of the child because if he is forced to stand up before he crawls, it can harm his hip. Your bony and nervous system must be prepared for it to happen. - Next comes the competition ontoilet training
. To achieve this, a neurological maturation is necessary. Doing it before can be counterproductive. -The exit of the teeth
is another issue for which one competes. One child goes to the first months and others who are one year old remain toothless. The teeth also appear at a maturational and biological level. The fact that parents educate in one way or another has nothing to do with it. - The level of communication of the child is also competed for .
Some children who feel the need to communicate and others are calmer and do not need it at the moment. - Later the competitions appear in the school and sports field
. The attitude of parents Children mature each in their own way and it is a mistake to compare children for something that we can not control and compete for it. Therefore, the important thing is that before all the maturational skills that appear in the smallwhat prevails is the importance of the child being healthy and happy
and not showing that kind of skills quickly or before others.