When the child does not want to sleep alone

Of course the children do not want to sleep alone! Neither want nor should. Babies who are not in contact with the body of their mothers, experience an inhospitable empty universe that moves them away from the longing for wellbeing that they brought with them from the period they lived in the loving

Of course the children do not want to sleep alone! Neither want nor should. Babies who are not in contact with the body of their mothers, experience an inhospitable empty universe that moves them away from the longing for wellbeing that they brought with them from the period they lived in the loving belly of their mothers.

Newborn babies are not ready for a jump to nothing: to a cradle without movement, without smell, without sound, without feeling of life.

Sleep with parents. Coconuts

This separation from the mother's body causes more suffering than we can imagine and establishes a nonsense in the mother-child bond. It's okay if we bring the children to our beds. We will all be happy. It is enough to do the test to verify that the child falls asleep between smiles, that the night is soft and that there is nothing that can be counterproductive when there is well-being.

Unfortunately young mothers distrust our ability to understand our children's requests that are unmistakably clear. Socially circulates the idea that meet the needs of a baby makes them "spoiled", although paradoxically, we get again and again the opposite result to the expected, because as we do not sleep hand-to-hand with children, nor touch , we do not press them ... they are going to claim more and more.

Let us think that "time" for young children appears as a painful and heartbreaking fact if the mother does not come, unlike the experiences inside the uterus where all needs were met instantly. Now wait, it hurts. If the children have to wait too long to find comfort in their mother's arms, they will cling vigorously to the breasts, biting, hurting or crying, as soon as they have access to the mother's body.

Fear will be the main company, because they will know that the absence of the mother will return at any time to devour them. Children are right to claim physical contact because they are totally dependent on maternal care. They are aware of their fragility and do what every healthy child should do: demand sufficient care for their survival. The night is long and dark, and no child should go through it alone. Even when? Until the child does not need it anymore.

Laura Gutman

Argentine Psychopedagogist

Writer and expert on childhood and motherhood

Editor: Alba Caraballo.