The Oedipus complex in children
The Oedipus or Electra complex (depending on whether it is a boy or a girl), is a phase of falling in love with a mother or father that all children experience in a more or less marked way . It is a normal period in the development of every child that begins around 3 or 4 years and reaches its maxim
The Oedipus or Electra complex (depending on whether it is a boy or a girl), is a phase of falling in love with a mother or father that all children experience in a more or less marked way .
It is a normal period in the development of every child that begins around 3 or 4 years and reaches its maximum expression on the 5.
What is the Oedipus complex in children
The term was coined by Sigmund Freud, father of psychoanalysis to explain what in colloquial terms we call 'mamitis' or 'papitis'. S. Freud elaborated a complex theory, revolutionary in his time, taking as reference the Greek tragedy "Oedipus Rex", in which Oedipus kills without knowing his father and ends up marrying his mother.
While it is true that children go through their first 5 years through different phases of 'mamitis' and acute 'papitis', phases in which only mom or dad comforts them and do not want to be with anyone else, There is a subtle difference between the usual 'mamitis' or 'papitis' and what we call the Oedipus Complex. We must try to help our children to correctly overcome this phase without becoming entangled and generating incorrect patterns of rivalry towards the father or mother.
How the Oedipus complex manifests itself in children
We should pay special attention if we have a child who:
- Spends the day saying that when he is older he will marry mom.
- He cries inconsolably when mom leaves.
- He always wants to be in the middle of mom, and he feels jealous of the signs of affection that mom makes to dad. En - As soon as you are careless, try to stroke your breasts.
- Your favorite word is 'no'.
How to deal with the Oedipus Complex. Advice to parents
We must
be patient and help our children overcome this phase of oedipal. To do so, we will try to avoid magnifying their performances or ridicule the child for feeling jealous. Let's not go into their game of rivalries or make them occupy a place in the family that is not their own by letting them sleep with us when Papa is not there or if we have recently separated. We must live this phase as
a normal phase , one more stage of the child's development. When the relationship between mother-child or father-daughter is becoming excessively absorbing, it is necessary to talk with our partners to let the child find his place in the family. As much as we drool over our children, boys or girls, we should never leave our partners aside and let ourselves be subjugated by this new maternal or paternal-filial relationship.
