What to do when the child is not assertive

The education of children must also take into account the development of their social capacities. For this, it is essential to use the assertiveness techniques , so the child will learn to give their opinions and criticisms and defend their rights in a peaceful way, without harming others. On many o

The education of children must also take into account the development of their social capacities. For this, it is essential to use the assertiveness techniques, so the child will learn to give their opinions and criticisms and defend their rights in a peaceful way, without harming others.

On many occasions, children have attitudes that range from passivity to aggressiveness, these being extreme concepts of assertive behavior. In these cases, parents and teachers should be a help for the little ones. According to the Ministry of Education, Culture and Sport Spanish, there are two ways to educate in assertiveness, indirect and direct.

Indirect techniques to educate in assertiveness

1. The indirect forms of educating in assertiveness are based on how we can influence the child without being aware of it. In general, this method is based on the parents' empathy towards children, that is, they must know the problem their child has, listen to them and put themselves in their place.

2. Another indirect technique of achieving assertive behavior is to reinforce the child's abilities, recognizing positively if he has behaved correctly. Care should be taken not to indulge in repetitive behavior with flattery, and only to use them in a general way when the child successfully overcomes more difficult behaviors or that he had not achieved before.

Direct techniques to educate in assertiveness

The direct forms of educating in assertiveness are used especially when the child knows the social problem he has, but does not know how to deal with it. A usual case is that of school bullying by a classmate, which leads the child to feel overwhelmed and anguished, with low self-esteem, and even to reduce their academic performance.

In this case, parents should guide their child and make him / her understand that the problem has a solution, forming a common team. He must be transmitted security and trust.

Adults should anailize together with the child why the harassment occurs and the options that have to face such situation, thus will also strengthen the decision capacity of the child. They can explain to their child examples of similar cases that are known, and even give an explanation of how to deal with this type of social problems.